I was soundly asleep this morning when the phone rang. My first instincts were to let it continue ringing till the user gets tired of waiting. However, this persistent caller refuse to put down the bloody phone, forcing me to pull away my blanket before the shrieking rings tear down my roof. As i put the earpiece near my drowsy head, the voice of a female thundered my ear drums. "ren ah! faster come down and take a look at your car! what happened ah? is it your friends who did this as an idea of a joke? do you know how many people are looking at your car? This is so embarrassing! look at our neighbours! Pls be reminded that this is your father's car and not your own car! hurry up get down here and remove the newspapers!!". I thought it must be one of another of my friends punkie jokes so i simply ignore my mother's cry and went back to sleep. Fifteen minutes later, as i was just about to doze off to never never land, the familiar shriek tore throught the golden silence once again. *ring ring*... " hallo...?" "why are you still in bed! hurry up get down here! i'm not joking with you i tell you! i'm very very angry" "okie lah okie lah..." and i pulled the blanket over my shivering body.
The burning sun rose to 45 degrees above the horizon with the rays shooting between the gaps of the HDB through my window concentrating on the rosy cheek of my left butt. I felt the burn, a wake up call by God. My throat felt extremely dry so i took a huge gulp of water in an attempt to moist the desert-ie feeling. An outstretched left hand to grap my D70, outstretched right hand to hook up my car keys and off i went to document the latest vandalism act.
The lift door opened and the morning wind brushed against the birdnest upon my head. I greeted it with a nasty cough complete with jade green phlem *spit*. The working crowd was already gone. The only people strolling around was this old man and a couple of maids. My eyes narrowed as the old man crept around my sporty nissan march. Off came the lens came and the shutter went *chek chek*.
The muscles on my faced relaxed and pulled towards my ear to reveal a grin at how stupid my friends were. I stood across the carpark observing the curious old man. Suddenly he turned his head towards me, glazing at my huge camera. I hurried the direction of the kit lens towards the ground as in an attempt to disguise my efforts of capturing this pervert eyeing on my car. Before i knew it, he was standing over me. "what are you doing young man."
"oh i was trying to take a photograph of this little green grass over here" (which i was really trying to cause there weren't many green grasses around since the last rainfall a month ago).
"nice meh?" he questioned.
"not bad lah, you see the light over here and the shadow cast by the car boot? completes the picture!"
"then you should take that car over there!" he gestured with his wrinkled finger. "it looks as though someone sprayed this car, just that they used newspaper!"
Amidst my laughter, i crooked " yah yah sure thing..."
I waited for him to go before i took little steps towards this strangely looking monster.
I can hardly recognised my car! I swore to capture these evil-doers! Enough said. Let me get down to how i managed to trace the owner of these nasty acts. First of all, only stupid people commit stupid acts like these. The idiot who pasted the newspaper on my windscreen left his name on it. Yah... how dumb can he get. Reliable sources has informed me that this dumbo is arranging a flight out of Singapore to escape from me as i type. I shall ambush him at the airport later this evening.
Evidence 1
Given the magnitude, i doubt the ability of the idiot to complete the act on his own. He must have at least 2 accomplices. As i combed the surrounding aread for more clues, i stumbled upon the picture of a man with the words "you've been punked" scribbled on it. Seriously, i refuse to believe that this dead man struggled all the way across middle east, to china down to thailand past malaysia just to punk my car. So i decided to rule him out as a suspect.
Evidence 2
Tearing away the newspaper, i uncovered the last piece of evidence. These dumbos left me a tool by which i could trace their identities. Someone help these poor souls. Conduct a Do-not-leave-your-belongings-behind-after-commiting-a-crime class for them PLEASSE.
Evidence 3
I made a detailed analysis on this highlighter. DNA and fingerprint test pointed me towards the three suspects. They are wanted crimminals so whoever knows them or have information of their whereabouts, pls post a comment. The reward for leading me to these suspects is highly valuable. Pls refer to www.garang-guni.com.sg for a catalogue.
Suspect 1
Suspect 2
Suspect 3
The burning sun rose to 45 degrees above the horizon with the rays shooting between the gaps of the HDB through my window concentrating on the rosy cheek of my left butt. I felt the burn, a wake up call by God. My throat felt extremely dry so i took a huge gulp of water in an attempt to moist the desert-ie feeling. An outstretched left hand to grap my D70, outstretched right hand to hook up my car keys and off i went to document the latest vandalism act.
The lift door opened and the morning wind brushed against the birdnest upon my head. I greeted it with a nasty cough complete with jade green phlem *spit*. The working crowd was already gone. The only people strolling around was this old man and a couple of maids. My eyes narrowed as the old man crept around my sporty nissan march. Off came the lens came and the shutter went *chek chek*.
The muscles on my faced relaxed and pulled towards my ear to reveal a grin at how stupid my friends were. I stood across the carpark observing the curious old man. Suddenly he turned his head towards me, glazing at my huge camera. I hurried the direction of the kit lens towards the ground as in an attempt to disguise my efforts of capturing this pervert eyeing on my car. Before i knew it, he was standing over me. "what are you doing young man."
"oh i was trying to take a photograph of this little green grass over here" (which i was really trying to cause there weren't many green grasses around since the last rainfall a month ago).
"nice meh?" he questioned.
"not bad lah, you see the light over here and the shadow cast by the car boot? completes the picture!"
"then you should take that car over there!" he gestured with his wrinkled finger. "it looks as though someone sprayed this car, just that they used newspaper!"
Amidst my laughter, i crooked " yah yah sure thing..."
I waited for him to go before i took little steps towards this strangely looking monster.
I can hardly recognised my car! I swore to capture these evil-doers! Enough said. Let me get down to how i managed to trace the owner of these nasty acts. First of all, only stupid people commit stupid acts like these. The idiot who pasted the newspaper on my windscreen left his name on it. Yah... how dumb can he get. Reliable sources has informed me that this dumbo is arranging a flight out of Singapore to escape from me as i type. I shall ambush him at the airport later this evening.
Evidence 1
Given the magnitude, i doubt the ability of the idiot to complete the act on his own. He must have at least 2 accomplices. As i combed the surrounding aread for more clues, i stumbled upon the picture of a man with the words "you've been punked" scribbled on it. Seriously, i refuse to believe that this dead man struggled all the way across middle east, to china down to thailand past malaysia just to punk my car. So i decided to rule him out as a suspect.
Evidence 2
Tearing away the newspaper, i uncovered the last piece of evidence. These dumbos left me a tool by which i could trace their identities. Someone help these poor souls. Conduct a Do-not-leave-your-belongings-behind-after-commiting-a-crime class for them PLEASSE.
Evidence 3
I made a detailed analysis on this highlighter. DNA and fingerprint test pointed me towards the three suspects. They are wanted crimminals so whoever knows them or have information of their whereabouts, pls post a comment. The reward for leading me to these suspects is highly valuable. Pls refer to www.garang-guni.com.sg for a catalogue.
Suspect 1
Suspect 2
Suspect 3
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